Do something

It's 4:30 am and I am wide awake. Sleep has not been the same since that day of horror when Jason died. Yet I have come to be OK with it most of the time. The time just before dawn can be a very quiet time to spend in appreciation for all that I have, for all hose in my life, and for meditation, prayer or reading gods word. I have found that the morning is the best time to center myself, reflect on what is going on in all of my relationships, my husband, my children and grandchildren, My family, my church family and my God. I know that if I start my day in devotion and prayer that my day comes together much better.
The internet has been a wonderful tool for me to find inspirational items, stay connected with friends and family and express my self in a way that is not possible for me to do any other way. I can put together pictures and certain items for memorabilia. Since I am such a pack rat it does help in that area of my life. So many wonderful creative items are possible from the use of the computer. I often create a collage of pictures of all my family and sometimes I create a very special piece of artwork to display. I am the type of person that needs to have something to remind me of Jason. If I can't see something I panic. My greatest fear is that Jason will be forgotten. I appreciate the fact that this is not the same for everyone, but it gives me much comfort. It keeps Jason close to me and I need that desperately.
I hope that for anyone who is experiencing the same problem with their sleep can find an outlet, hobby, or just the opportunity to be still and quiet before God. I can honestly say that a certain source of peace will come to you. Be patient and just do SOMETHING.
My heartfelt peace to you

Mom left behind